Merton’s Prayer

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desire to please, road ahead, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton, Thoughts In Solitude, trust in God

This prayer of Thomas Merton has been a staple for many people over the years. It has popped up several times now in my mail and as an advertisement for a Spirituality & Practice Workshop. I am tempted to sign up for the course as I am a fan of “all things Merton,” but perhaps this prayer is all I need. It certainly speaks to this moment of time in our world. Won’t you pray it with me today…and perhaps for each of the remaining days of this tumultuous year that we’re experiencing.

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this, you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust you always, though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone. (Thoughts in Solitude)

The Long View

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compassion, Kathleen Deignan, The Hidden Ground of Love, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton, tolerance

As we learn that the election we have just concluded was fair and decisive, we realize also that the “new day” is not yet upon us. There will be challenges to what has been determined as “the will of the people” and we need patience and stability to assure a safe transition. I read a brief paragraph this morning from Thomas Merton’s Book of Hours by Kathleen Deignan that gave me a glimpse of a possible “long view” going forward. It will be my companion for this day as I struggle to wait for a resolution.

Merton writes: I think what I need to learn is an almost infinite tolerance and compassion because negative thought gets nowhere. I am beginning to think that in our time we will correct almost nothing, and get almost nowhere: but if we can just prepare a compassionate and receptive soil for the future, we will have done a great work. I feel at least that this is the turn my own life ought to take. (originally written by Merton in The Hidden Ground of Love, p. 20)

The Roots of Mercy

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Cynthia Bourgeault, Helen Luke, mercy, St. Maria Faustina Kowalska, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton

In her book, Mystical Hope, Cynthia Bourgeault speaks of the quality of mercy, drawing on the work of Helen Luke and Thomas Merton. This commentary shifted for me the meaning of the virtue that in my early life bore the impression of pity, as in “Lord, have mercy on us!” while beating our breasts.

For Luke, in her book Old Age, her understanding of mercy was broadened by a trip to the American Heritage Dictionary (!) where she found, as Cynthia explains, that “the word ‘mercy’ derives from the ancient Etruscan word merc; the words “commerce” and “merchant” share the same root. And so at heart, mercy means some kind of exchange or transaction. It is a connection word.” Luke goes on to connect the word to “the French merci, a grateful response and kindness of heart, and finally to compassion and forgiveness, including all our shades of darkness, whereby we are able to open ourselves to the Mercy.”

It is Thomas Merton, however, whose treatment of the word has stayed with me and remains a linchpin of how I should engage and treat people in all circumstances. In his essay “The Good Samaritan,” Merton refers to the original Semitic translation, which means “a fierce, bonding love – as between committed lovers. It is not about pity, but about passion.” He continues, “Chesed [mercy] is fidelity, it is also strength. It is ultimate and unfailing because it is the power that binds one person to another, in a covenant of hearts.”

Today we honor St. Maria Faustina Kowalska, the visionary who is particularly responsible for the feast of the Divine Mercy. We would do well to spend some time reflecting on the definitions above as they relate to the feast of today and give thanks to the God who is “rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us…” (EPH 2:4)

Good Morning!

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link, presence, present, silence, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton, Thomas Merton: A Book of Hours

Have you ever had one of those mornings where you wake up hardly able to move with everything you need to accomplish by day’s end? How to decide where to start? And then you grab a cup of coffee and sit down to figure it out…and suddenly the sun blasts out from behind the clouds .and you look down at the book you have just pulled off your shelf and Thomas Merton says:

Here I am. In me the world is present, and you are present. I am a link in a chain of light and presence. You have made me a kind of center but a center that is nowhere. And yet also I am “here.” To be here with the silence of Sonship in my heart is to be a center in which all things converge upon you. That is surely enough for the time being. (A Book of Hours, p.47-48)

And so it is.

Searching for Words

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circumstances, decisions, Kathleen Deignan, necessity, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton, Thomas Merton: A Book of Hours

Today feels like a turning toward necessity. How to describe that, I’m really not certain. The meaning feels just below or above the the surface of things so rather than trust my own words, I turn to Thomas Merton because his prose often pushes me deeper or higher. In the “Friday, Day” section of A Book of Hours I find the following:

Wrestling quietly with the circumstances of my life. There is an attitude to be taken, there are decisions to be made. There is a radical refusal demanded of me somewhere and I do not know where it begins and ends and how to approach it.

God makes us ask ourselves questions most often when He intends to resolve them. He gives us needs that He alone can satisfy and awakens capacities that He means to fulfill. Any perplexity is liable to be a spiritual gestation, leading to a new birth and mystical generation.

(Thomas Merton: A Book of Hours. Kathleen Deignan, p.171-172)

Quotable Quotes

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poverty, prayer, seek, silence, Sisters of St. Joseph, solitude, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton

There are a lot of people who have chosen a specific quote that expresses something important to them, something that they want to say to all the people with whom they share e-mail. I’m always interested to read these brief messages that conclude their e-mails to see if I think they fit the person behind the quote. Last week one of my Sisters of St. Joseph treated me to a quote of Thomas Merton that was characteristic of him but one I had never heard before. I might have claimed it for myself if I were called to choose it from the many great lines that run through my brain on any given day. I don’t know if I could ever settle on one choice to the exclusion of all others but this one is certainly a contender.

Do you have a favorite? This one came from Sister Linda Neil, CSJ, and I could say I value its message more and more each day. Thanks to Lin!

Let me seek, then, the gift of silence, and poverty, and solitude, where everything I touch is turned into prayer, where the sky is my prayer, the birds are my prayer, the wind in the trees is my prayer, for God is all in all.

A “Merton Moment”

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creation, morning, presence, silence, spring, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton, Thomas Merton: A Book of Hours

We had tornado warnings last evening but only got torrential rains that seem to have washed away layers of distress and moved us finally into a glorious taste of spring. I thank God for windows this morning! The first blast of beauty that met me was the flowering cherry tree in the west corner that was glorious seen from above (the second floor). Downstairs there was a congregation of colorful birds on the newly washed deck – more variety than we have ever had! In addition to the ever-present yellow of the finches we have a second appearance of Baltimore orioles and, for the first time, a contingent of rose-breasted grosbeaks. They all know where the party is and it is a delight to watch them as they find breakfast, dancing and singing this early in the day to give me courage.

I sit here in the sun, feeling the gentleness of the breeze and imaging Thomas Merton on the tiny porch of his hermitage on mornings just like this one. The leaves on the trees still sparkle with the remnants of the rain as I turn to his words for a way to express praise of this wonderland of creation.

The most wonderful moment of the day is that when creation in its innocence asks permission to “be” once again, as it did on the first morning that ever was…There are drops of dew that show like sapphires in the grass as soon as the morning sun appears, and leaves stir behind the hushed flight of an escaping dove…Today, Father, this blue sky lauds you…The distant blue hills praise you, together with the sweet-smelling air that is full of brilliant light…I too, Father, praise you, with all these my brothers, and they give voice to my own heart and to my own silence. We are all one silence, and a diversity of voices…Here I am. In me the world is present, and you are present. I am a link in the chain of light and of presence…(Thomas Merton: A Book of Hours)

On the Second Day of May

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creation, light, pandemic, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton, wholeness

Today feels like what Thomas Merton might describe as “the first day of Creation.” I feel the warmth of a sun that is already shining so bright and full through my window that I am unable to see my computer screen. I need to lean toward the south to shade the brilliance enough to type. It is glorious in both heat and light and leads me to shout silently to God that “this is what May is supposed to be like!” In my mind I am already out picking up branches that were victims of the wind these last three days. I can already imagine that by sunset there will be tiny leaves on branches everywhere—a gift from the mixture of sun and rain…just how things are supposed to be.

It’s difficult on a morning like this to remember words like pandemic. The reality slowly seeps in but at the same time I begin to wonder if there isn’t a way—or more than one way—to see a wholeness in what seems an overwhelming dissonance. Would I be able (or even willing to try) to maintain the lightness of being produced by the sun’s warmth and the consequent burgeoning of life in creation today while holding the reality of death and dying that is all around? It would seem an impossible task but I sense a worthy challenge in it for myself today.

Of Sun and Snow

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accepting, Asian Journal, love, present, spirit, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton

On a morning like this when the sun is shining, accenting the beauty of an April snow, I look for words from Thomas Merton, having nothing of my own worthy of this glorious scene. From his Asian Journal here is the prayer I found:

O God, in accepting one another wholeheartedly, fully, completely, we accept You, and we thank You, and we adore You, and we love You with our whole being, because our being is in Your being, our spirit is rooted in Your spirit. Fill us then with love, and let us be bound together with love as we go our diverse ways, united in this one spirit which makes You present in the world, and which makes You witness to the ultimate reality that is love. Love has overcome. Love is victorious. Amen. (Thomas Merton: A Book of Hours, p.156-7)

And I would add on this Thursday in the Octave of Easter, ALLELUIA1

Sunshine

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coronavirus, Holy Week, infinite mercy, Jesus, Kathleen Deignan, New Seeds of Contemplation, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton

It was 6:37 a.m. this morning when I looked up from reading the updated statistics of the cases and deaths from the Coronavirus and saw the sun just below the top of my backyard mountain looking like a supersize flashlight that God had turned on just for me. Now it’s almost 8:00 and I am still sitting with a heavy heart because of the state of our state (NY)—highest statistics for infections and deaths from the virus—and the state of our nation and the world. There is no good news as we march toward Holy Week to consider what seemed to be the end of the amazing ministry of Jesus, the miracle worker.

There is no possibility of looking directly out my window now, however, because the sun is too bright. I can no longer see the mountain and I notice a stirring inside me that is totally contradictory of all that I have been considering since my morning began. It rises like the words of Thomas Merton as I read a random (?) psalm prayer to obliterate the darkness and get me off my chair to face the day.

Love comes out of God and gathers us to God in order to pour itself back into God through all of us and bring us all back to Him on the tide of His own infinite mercy. So we all become doors and windows through which God shines back into His own house. (New Seeds of Contemplation, p. 67, quoted by Kathleen Deignan in Thomas Merton: A Book of Hours, p.153.)