Tags
existence, God, Hearts on Fire, Joseph Tetlow SJ, Lord, name, The Sophia Center for Spirituality
It took me a long time to get comfortable with my name. My mother, I have heard, was looking for names that didn’t have the likelihood of devolving into nicknames. (That was a lost cause!) I think she was also interested in finding names that were uncommon, if not really unique. (The majority of Catholic girls of my age had a Mary or Marie attached somehow.) The one thing that comforted me about my name (although I was often asked where Superman was hiding) was that I was the only Lois in my class from kindergarten through high school.
Today I came across a prayer by Joseph Tetlow, SJ that focused more on who we are in the eyes of God and how our name becomes us as we grow into that identity. Knowing that I am unique in all the world (as we all are) because of God’s call, I pray:
Oh, Lord my God, you called me from the sleep of nothingness merely because in your tremendous love you want to make good and beautiful beings. You have called me by my name in my mother’s womb. You have given me breath and light and movement and walked with me every moment of my existence. I am amazed, Lord God of the universe, that you attend to me and, more, cherish me. Create in me the faithfulness that moves you and I will trust you and yearn for you all my days. Amen. (Hearts on Fire, p.14)
There are two adjacent ranch-style houses on our road whose owners each planted four trees in a row across their front yard. I have watched them grow over the years and sometimes wonder if it was the desire of the owners to have a lot of shade, to hide from the road or just to satisfy their love of trees. They have seemed to me as they’ve grown like a line of sentinels from one yard to the other. Because I am always driving when I pass them, I really don’t know if they are the same kind of trees; I just admire their beauty and their strength.
In the little book of Jesuit prayers entitled Hearts on Fire, I opened this morning at random to one called “Prayer of Reconciliation.” I was interested in what the prayer said about the mental process that can quickly lead to blame in our dealing with others as well as our judgment of their motivations. When we come from a place of difference or separation it becomes easy to denigrate the other while shoring up a skewed sense of our own innocence or righteousness. We would do well to carry a small mirror with us (if only a virtual one) to look into our own eyes and see the love that is God’s Spirit looking back at us before we judge another.
I come late to this task this morning. Perhaps it was the cold that kept me sleeping until the shocking hour of just before eight o’clock! The temperature continues to hover around zero degrees and warnings of frostbite because of wind still make the national news. I feel rather stuck here in my chair with the only thought being that of the impending turn of the calendar. Today is not the last day of the year; that reality dawns with tomorrow but seems all around me now in shadow. Psalm 96 calls me to praise but I feel like a person on a diving board who isn’t sure of how to swim in the water that awaits me.
From four sources this morning I heard the same message.
Today takes it’s cue somewhat from yesterday’s entry. In the book of Jesuit prayers entitled Hearts on Fire, there is a prayer written by Pedro Arrupe, who was the beloved Superior General (world leader) of the Society of Jesus for 18 years (1965-1983) -a long term of office for anyone! His prayer gives a clue of how to bring the Scriptures alive in our daily journey, helping us to take our cue from Christ’s interaction with all sorts of people as he opened himself to all who crossed his path.
There was a very quick thunderstorm this morning at 5:30 outside my window: torrential rain and one blast of thunder and lightning. It was as if nature was washing away everything and readying the day to start afresh with life. It’s a perfect beginning for my day. All major events of my year (at least those I’m aware of) are finished, so it seems everything will be “back to normal” now, if such a thing truly exists! On my slow trek home yesterday through lovely terrain and many traffic slowdowns (not to mention a stop during the eclipse) I listened to a couple of “homemade” CD playlists that took me on a tour of earlier times in my life. It was a sweet remembering and an exercise in gratitude that tied the weekend up in a perfect conclusion.
Yesterday I wrote about charisms, the gifts we possess and offer to the world. These are not material gifts but gifts of the heart. Sometimes we band together with others to strengthen what it is that effects some change or gives some hope to the world. Often we have little or no sense of the impact of our presence in the lives of others. Sometimes it is the smallest kindness that saves another person in an hour of need. Mother Theresa said something like: “We need not do great things but only little things with great love.”