Growing in Wisdom

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Cynthia Bourgeault, desire for God, grace, jumpstart, life lesson, prayer, Sirach, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, wisdom

When I think about my “wisdom journey,” I often refer to 2003 as a beginning point, but it would be sad to think that I began my search for God at that late moment in my life. I was already 55 years old then. (Of note, however, is the fact that “5” is a significant number for change in numerology.) That year is significant because it signaled the beginning of a disciplined study of the wisdom tradition of Christianity under the tutelage of a teacher—Cynthia Bourgeault. It was a “jumpstart” to a new chapter in my life as it focused my prayer and religious studies to enable a deeper dive into spirituality.

I will always be grateful , not only for Cynthia, but for all the people I have met and the work I have been privileged to be part of over these last 18 years.

I don’t mean to sound like I am finished learning or going into retirement—not yet! What has precipitated this reflection is actually the first lectionary reading for today, from the Hebrew Scriptures book of Sirach. Here are the lines:
“When I was young and innocent, I sought wisdom openly in my prayer. I prayed for her before the temple and I will seek her until the end, and she flourished as a grape soon ripe. My heart delighted in her; my feet kept to the level path because from earliest youth I was familiar with her…”

As I look back over my life, I recognize—not for the first time—that the desire for God was always in me and all my experiences and lessons were important to the growth and deepening of that desire, until I was ready to act more directly on it. At that point, I trust that God said something like: “YOU GO, GIRL!” and then provided everything I needed to proceed. I have often heard that “when the student is ready the teacher appears.” I know that to be true in my life but not just when the lifelong lessons “appear”—but all along the way from all the sources of grace—people and experiences—that spark the fire that is the Holy Spirit inside.

Can you plot the workings of God in your life? Are there touch points when you suddenly—or not so suddenly—understood something important happening for your growth? Do you ask in prayer for understanding of the events and place of people in your life? And what is the place of gratitude in your prayer? Worthy questions, don’t you think?

Why Resist?

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God, grace, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Thomas Merton

My body can hardly sit in this chair because it is 9:20 AM and I have yet not settled on a thought worthy of being written. I keep trying to fit thoughts into a lesson from Thomas Merton. He sounds like I feel on this cloudy but still morning and it makes me smile that a great writer/theologian could find himself in the same state as someone like me. He says this:

My mind is scattered among things, not because of my work, but because I am not detached and I do not attend first of all to God. On the other hand, I do not attend to Him because I am so absorbed in all these objects and events. I have to wait on his grace. But how stubborn and slow my nature is. And how I keep confusing myself and complicating things for myself by useless twisting and turning. What I need most of all is the grace to really accept God as He gives Himself to me in every situation. (Entering the Silence, p. 199)

So I guess I’ve found my place for the day, after all!

Overwhelming Challenge

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Capitol, challenge, consciousness, grace, hate, John, love, Peace, reconstruction, The Sophia Center for Spirituality

Never has it been more difficult to open my computer to consider what to say for a blog post. After yesterday, there seems no way to express the feelings that I now I share with all those in the U.S. who witnessed the wanton destruction that took place in Washington, D.C. yesterday. We now know some of the horror, sadness and upheaval that so many lands live with all the time. How are we to face what has happened and move beyond blaming to a consciousness of what has happened, in order to find peace and reconstruction of our government and our hearts?

As it happens, I found in my mailbox at noon today an answer that posed a gigantic challenge for me. Join me, if you will, in what will likely be a very difficult process of effort at healing. You see, I doubt we will be able to explain away the violence and if we do not meet it head on (the reasons for it, I mean) it will remain in our collective consciousness to our detriment. So here is what I found when I opened the devotional pamphlet that gives me hope for every day. It’s called Living Faith and that seems more essential today than ever before. Here is what awaited me of the actual lectionary readings for today. It was shocking in its challenge but struck me as exactly what I needed.

If anyone says, “I love God,” but hates his brother, he is a liar, for whoever does not love a brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.” (1 JN 4:20). Consider that with respect to the events of yesterday and pray for grace.

A State of Grace

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desire to please, Eckhart Tolle, grace, life, lightness, present moment, resistance, The Sophia Center for Spirituality

After reading over what I wrote on Saturday and lived through yesterday that provided me no time to write, I am convinced that I am finally coming closer to understanding how to BE in the face of this existence we call LIFE. I have known for a long time that I am not in charge of my life but only responsible to respond to it as it unfolds. I can do that with resistance or acceptance, tightening or loosening my hold on it as I go. Tightening only gives me pain as muscles are not flexed but stiffened. Allowing what comes to wash over me with openness and deep breathing is a better stance. Conveniently—and no longer surprising to me—I find Eckhart Tolle’s “Present Moment Reminder” today quite apropos. He says:

To offer no resistance to life is to be in a state of grace, ease, and lightness. This state is then no longer dependent upon things being in a certain way good or bad.

A Tender Testament

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Ancient Songs Sung Anew, grace, lift up, Lynn Bauman, psalm 121, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Your hand shall guide me

The psalm from today’s lectionary in most Christian denominations is a familiar and consoling one. At least the first two lines are generally recognized. (“I lift up my eyes from the mountains from whence comes my help. My help is from the Lord who made heaven and earth.” PS 121) The psalmist seems to begin in these verses to be stating his confidence in God and then changes his address to his listeners, giving reasons for all of us to have trust in God.

Lynn Bauman has chosen to frame the psalm as a direct address to God, a kind of testament to relationship, one might say, which I found quite beautiful this morning. I write it here as a streaming totality, a love letter maybe, that flows from the pen of a grateful servant. See what you think.

“The summits of the mountains draw my eyes and lift them upward and beyond to you, the secret source of all my being. For in the height and depths of you, in you alone, I find the grace and help I need to walk upon this path called earth and never stumble nor go astray. For you as guard and guide keep watch; you will not sleep by day or night as we do. I walk into your wakefulness; your guarding eye, your guiding hand protects and shades my way. The sun by day, the moon by night provide no better light than yours, no better shade. And in the shadows of the mountains deep you preserve me from its evils. And in this traffic of the heart you shield my life and keep my soul in all its many wanderings, until at last I come to stand, my weary feet now firm upon the borders of your land, eternity.” (Ancient Songs Sung Anew, p.315)

Three in One

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contemplation, divine Spirit, grace, Holy Trinity, mystery, St. Paul, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, Trinity

For centuries, in countries all over the world, scholars and theologians have tried to explain the mystery at the heart of Christianity: the Trinity. We Christians have struggled to find a way to explain “three Persons in one God” well enough to satisfy. Images of three-leaf clovers, triangles and so many others have been part of our religious education. Recently many have been aided by the wildly popular book, The Shack but still the depth of our faith can only admit that “it’s a mystery.”

Letting go of intellect and accepting the fact that our God as Trinity means, as someone once said (very wisely, I think), “not a problem to be solved but a mystery to be lived.” Sometimes I need to just sit and marvel at the generosity of a Creator of such a glorious universe as ours and the benevolence of the love poured out to the finite creation that is humanity. At other moments my need is for a God who is like me, living as part of the great creation, understanding what it means to live a human life with all its joys and suffering. And the potential of deeper contemplation that touches into the life of the Spirit in each of us and all of us, allowing us to catch meaning in ways that bring us ever closer to the meaning of Love is thrilling. That “still, small voice” inside us that cannot be attributed to any power of our own but is clearly a gift of the Divine Spirit living in us defines the work of that “Third Person of the Blessed Trinity” like no other facet of our experience.

So today, on this feast of the Holy Trinity, I am happy to greet you in the familiar words of St. Paul: “The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with all of you.”

Waiting for the Spirit

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Ascension, grace, let go of fear, Pentecost, psalm 27, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, trust, weakness

It’s always a wonder when the weather outside reflects a state of soul, like a birthday gift that one has longed for but is not sure of receiving. That may seem like a great stretch as leaving the state of soul to the vagaries of the weather seems a bit shallow, but a glorious spring day can certainly lift one’s spirits and add hope to the daily routine.

Psalm 27 gave me that lift just now as the birds announced a lovely Sunday. This interim time from the feast of the Ascension of Christ to Pentecost is a perfect opportunity to reflect on possibility as we consider what is to come: the recognition of God’s Spirit lighting up the world. This “novena” of waiting is building the power of the Spirit in each of us and all of us, allowing us to respond to the call to be the light that we need to see us through the present—a difficult moment, to be sure—into whatever blessed future awaits us if we are willing to find the strength to persevere and create it.

The psalmist sings out: The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom should I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom should I be afraid? Though the enemy should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear, though war should rise up against me, even then will I trust. One thing I ask of the Lord; this I seek: to dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze on the loveliness of the Lord.

Can we spend this moment—this week of grace—gathering our willingness and trusting our ability to let go of fear and any weakness that clings to us, recognizing that God is indeed doing something new, readying us to step into a future that calls us together for the life of the world?

May it be so at Pentecost.

Debate

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enemy, forgiveness, friend, grace, gratitude, John Philip Newell, mercy, Praying With the Earth, The Sophia Center for Spirituality

Everything is quiet this morning. I woke up to a morning with no wind, no rain, no snow – and no cars racing down the road. I was grateful for all that after the tumultuous debate of democratic candidates for President of the United States last night. Most bothersome was the disregard for time limits as people continued to talk while others were chiming in with their opinions and disagreements until it became what I imagine the Tower of Babel was like. I presume this will continue now until the primary races are over and there is a named nominee. And then there will be the more contentious period of run-up to the general election. It will not be a pretty process, but unavoidable for committed citizens. While we don’t need to listen to everything, staying above the fray and listening to nothing is not the way to participate in our democracy so I am grateful for moments like this one and guides like John Philip Newell who grounds me in simplicity with his morning prayers. Won’t you join me today?

We wake to the forgiveness of a new day. We wake to the freedom to begin again. We wake to the mercy of the sun’s redeeming light. Always new, always gift, always blessing. We wake to the forgiveness of this new day.

May our enemy become our friend, O God, that we may share earth’s goodness. May our enemy become our friend, O God, that our children may meet and marry. May our enemy become our friend, O God, that we may remember our shared birth in you. May we grow in grace, may we grow in gratitude, may we grow in wisdom, that our enemy may become our friend. (Praying with the Earth – A Prayerbook for Peace, p. 36)

Intense

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gift, grace, intense, judging, love, St. Angela Merici, The Sophia Center for Spirituality

Sometimes it only takes one word to capture my attention and get me thinking. It happened this morning as I read the section of 1 PT 4 that was an optional reading for the Memorial of St. Angela Merici, an important saint in the religious order of Ursuline Sisters. (Her biography is definitely worth a read.)

Here is the quote: Beloved, be serious and sober-minded so that you will be able to pray. Above all, let your love for one another be intense, because love covers a multitude of sins. Be hospitable to one another without complaining. As each one has received a gift, use it to serve one another as good stewards of God’s varied grace.

Diving deeply into that statement makes me consider several things:

1. It doesn’t matter how imperfect I am, I’m still called to a deep and high love.

2. We can’t be judging each other because all of us are imperfect (what a relief!).

3. Since we’re gifted by God in various ways, our love will probably be expressed differently and uniquely to each other.

4. There’s lots more possible to find about love when we delve the word intense…

In addition, questions: What is my particular gift in the complex of different ways to love? How can I best reflect God in my love for “all God’s children?”

Spiritual Gifts

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courage, grace, love, path of life, silence, The Sophia Center for Spirituality, wisdom

As I was reading just now about “the art of discernment” and the place of silence in that practice, I was treated to one of those brief prayers that asks God for some of the greatest qualities that we could desire. What I like in the prayer is the specificity of action that accompanies each gift so that we can focus on the “how” of developing it. See if that makes sense to you as it does to me.

Grant me, dear God, the grace and the courage to be still and know that you are God, the wisdom to allow my soul to wait for you in silence, and the love to choose a path of life. Amen.