I sit here wondering if I need to recant my words of yesterday about asking for help from other people in our journey of life. It’s today’s gospel acclamation that stopped me. I had just read the verses of one of my favorite Lenten psalms, savoring the best line that acclaims: “My soul waits for the Lord more than sentinels wait for the dawn.” (PS 130) I was even amazed as I looked out my bedroom window to see the sun totally up and blazing already, underscoring the fact that my waiting for God’s action in my day is true and ongoing…Then I read the following:
Cast away from you all the crimes you have committed, says the Lord, and make for yourselves a new heart and a new spirit.
That slammed into my brain with a force that wiped out every other thought…for about 30 seconds, and then the questions started flooding in. “Wait a minute,” I said. “I thought that was God’s job! Haven’t I always read that God would make a clean heart in me, washing away all my sins?” (etc.) And then: “How does that score with yesterday’s post about letting people help me?” (Sigh…)
The answer seems to be my willingness to suspend my ordinary way of thinking and move to a different kind of consciousness where all is one and God is all in all. I would like to simplify by using images like all the ingredients that go into a cake to make the one cake delicious…but that seems to cheapen the experience somehow. So I will leave it there and hold the mystery of the moment in the knowing of something that became clear in this graced morning in the sunshine.